I’m shedding other people’s opinions because I know in my heart and soul what’s right for me.
I used to be so concerned about what my family and God thought about my decisions. As a result, I made poor decisions because of that or sometimes made no decision at all. I would be paralyzed by worrying that I would disappoint them. It felt terrible for me.
I’ve learned that you are not going to appease everyone. Whatever choice you make, no matter what the topic, there is going to be someone who won’t agree with you. They may or may not speak up but there will always be someone. Here, I suggest that you make decisions that are right for YOU.
Granted, if other people are directly involved, it is considerate to address their concerns and get feedback. In this article, I’m mainly talking about not allowing too many opinions (or any opinions) redirect your decisions which could end up affecting your entire life.
Looking back on my life, I probably should not have married at 19 years old. I did because I allowed the voices around me, primarily from the Christian community, telling me that living together was a sin. For them, getting married was the only right way to live together.
I had more anxiety with the thought of living together than I did marrying someone I had only known for six months! I allowed others’ opinions to override my inner voice. You know that inner voice. It’s the one that steers you in the direction your soul knows is right for you when others say it’s wrong. That one decision changed my life ENTIRELY!
We were married for six years, but only really happy for about two years. I’m not sure what would have been if we had waited to get married. I do know that I’m no longer going to allow other voices to overpower my own inner voice, my intuition. That little voice comes with a feeling that always asks: “What about this?” Now, when it speaks, I listen.
Here are the reasons I listen to myself and stop worrying so much about others’ opinions:
I know what is best for me
I get that feeling that says “Let’s Go!” or “Stop! This is not for you!” If it’s a purchase, I have to decipher my emotions so as not to buy something in that hyped state. Sometimes, when buying a house or car especially, your emotions will be guiding you to want it so badly but you just know deep down whether it’s truly right or wrong for you.
I know what I need and want
No one else truly knows what you want and need beside you. Sometimes your spouse or partner at the time knows, too, but you do you, boo.
Whatever you choose is YOUR responsibility
No matter what, it’s your decision. It’s yours to make, right or wrong, and you must take ownership of it. To me, that is a good feeling! Sure, it sucks if something goes wrong but at least you can look in the mirror and know this was your decision and your next step is to learn and move on. It’s empowering to control your destiny, where you can, at least. There is nothing worse than the feeling of regret. As Gabby Bernstien (The Universe Has Your Back) says,”Obstacles are detours in the right direction.”
On the other hand, it’s a great feeling when it goes right and you can rejoice in your determination. Success in taking control and ownership of your path begets more success.
It’s your life and you are in the driver’s seat. Not every decision will seem like the right one, but it is molding your life path and you can sleep at night knowing you are doing the best you can.
I’m not saying don’t ask for advice from time to time. That’s a necessary component of growth. But never forget to go with what truly feels right. It’s better to have truly lived then grow old with that regret.
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